No is not an Option
Do you use sex as a tool to manipulate your spouse into giving you what you want or withhold it as a weapon to get back at your spouse when you're angry? Do you fake headaches when you"re frustrated with your spouse or play tired when you know that you're not? Sounds like the average marriage.
1Cor 7:3-4 says The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. 4 The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife."
These passages of scripture are saying that your body does not belong to you, so it doesn't matter how mad you get, or how tired you are or how frustrated you are, you still have to fulfill your sexual obligations to one another, no is not an option. God created sex to be enjoyed in your marriage, don't see it as a chore, see it as a gift. The marriage bed is undefiled so don't be ashamed to enjoy what God was not ashamed to create.
Take time to cultivate and maintain a healthy and satisfying intimate sexual relationship so that you keep a strong connection with each other. Not only in the bedroom but in all of your life's endeavors. Remember sexual intimacy is food for your relationship, just like the word of God is food for your soul.